


First and Foremost

by CapsOff2



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Brother Feels, Brotherly Love, Bullying, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Loki (Marvel) Needs a Hug, Lullabies, Memories, Odin (Marvel)'s A+ Parenting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2019-08-28
Packaged: 2020-09-28 16:47:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20429189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CapsOff2/pseuds/CapsOff2
Summary: Thor sits Loki down for a talk. Confessions follow.





	First and Foremost

“You don’t know what it’s like! To always be in the shadow of others “greatness.” To be mocked! To be tormented! You--don’t--know--what--it’s--like--to--be--ME!” Loki shouted, tears in his eyes, but Thor wasn’t sure whether they were from anger or sadness.

“Brother I…” he started, but cut himself off as Loki held up his hand.

“Don’t say another-word,” he hissed at him in a low voice. “I know what you’re going to say, ‘Loki, I understand, brother. Loki, I’m here for you. Loki Loki Loki!’ Well I’m done, Thor, with your false understanding. I’m done with you!” With that he shoved Thor hard in the chest, turned on his heel, and ran towards the large doors that would provide him refuge from his brother’s pestering. Before he could reach them, however, two large arms wrapped around him and he was tackled to the ground, his cheek pressed against the cool marble. He struggled weakly as Thor pulled him up, wrapped in a bear hug/restraining hold. Thor pinned him gently against the mahogany wall next to one of the many tall bookcases, filled with many rune plated, woven with gold, written in old Norse books. 

“No, no, no! Why?! Why can’t you just leave me alone?!” Loki yelled in despair, trying to no avail to escape Thor’s grip. Thor looked him dead in the eyes: one bright blue meeting narrowed emeralds.

“Loki, what had gotten into you?” he demanded, shaking him lightly. “You’re always so collected, seemingly emotionless. Now look at yourself! What--is--wrong?”

Loki, seemingly noticing how he was acting, tried to bring him back together, stated cooly, if a bit shakily, “N-nothing is wrong.” Thor sighed, a bit exasperated.

“Loki, you are not leaving until you explain. Now I’m going to set you down in a chair and we are going to talk about this. If you try to run away, we will do this the hard way. Do I make myself clear?” Thor sharply stated, fixing Loki with a steady stare. Loki simply glares at him until he realizes that Thor is serious, and gives up, jerking his head the tiniest inch up and down. Thor throws Loki over his shoulder, much to Loki’s protest, and walks over to two of the cushioned, scarlet red armchairs, built with the finest dark oak wood in the Nine Realms. Thor gently sets Loki down in one of the chairs and sits in the one directly across from it. “So tell me, brother, what is bothering you?” Thor asks with concern in his voice. Loki’s eyes narrow, as he hisses,

“For starters, stop calling me your  _ brother _ . You and I both know that, that’s not true. I’m not your brother, I’m not even of Asgardian blood. I was born a Jotun, a monster, the one that children fear lies under their beds, and I will die a monster.” Then he mutters, “You of all people should know that.” Thor’s eyes sadden as he looks upon his brother.

“I don’t know who made you believe this, Loki, but it’s not true. None of it. Who? Who dared to make you feel this way? I swear, I will have them thrown in the dungeons for all eternity..” he starts, but Loki cuts him off with a sharp bark of unamused laughter.

“Honestly, sometimes it surprises me, how little you know. You want to know who? Fine, I’ll tell you, but you can’t exactly throw him in the dungeon because he’s  **dead** !” Loki yells. Thor starts to try and speak, but Loki cuts him off. “You were always the favored child, Thor, and while you might have been too stupid to understand it, I wasn’t. I knew my place would forever be in shadows: your shadow, your parents’ shadow, the Warriors Three’s shadows. I tried, to no avail to prove my worth, but my magic was looked down upon as it was common for women to learn, not men. You have no idea how much I was teased and bullied for my books and study of magic, Thor! I never knew why, never understood why I wasn’t good enough for  **him** , until I found out he wasn’t my father at all. You defended me at times, yes, but you also started some of the teasing in the first place, and you laughed along, thinking it was all just a jolly good  **joke** . You, Odin, everyone in Asgard but Frigga, always looked down upon me! Do you have any idea what that does to a person!!!??? No, but you don’t need to, because you’re Thor, King of Asgard with people to do that for you.” Loki finished, sweating slightly, his emerald eyes glowing dangerously. Then he slumps over a little in his chair, and continues in a whisper, “I was always alone. Nobody cared, I just….existed. I didn’t get to live,.....Thor. I didn’t….” but he stops as he suddenly notices the tears falling down his face. Thor is frozen in his chair, tear tracks on his face, but he pulls himself together enough to wrap Loki in a hug. He feels Loki collapse against him, and he shakes as his tears fall on Thor’s shoulder.

Then suddenly they’re both crying, Thor more quietly, and they’re holding, gripping onto each other because at that moment, they need to feel the comfort of the other’s presence. Thor’s voice is shaky as he speaks, “Loki-I’m, I’m sorry. I know that I will never be able to repair the damage that has been done to you, but I’m sorry I didn’t notice your suffering.” Loki doesn’t reply, for it feels so good for him to just let it all out that he is incapable of speech. Thor feels an aching in his heart: he wants to help soothe his brother’s pain but he doesn’t know how. Then suddenly he has an idea. He pulls Loki close to him and begins to murmur in his ear, a song that Frigga sang to them at night and that he sang when Loki had nightmares.

_ “Sleep my little angel _

_ Don’t you cry in fear, distressed _

_ I am here forever with you _

_ In your heart and in your mind _

_ Don’t you worry ‘bout the future _

_ Our bond is tried and true,” _

Loki looks up at Thor and joins him in singing the final lines.

_ “Sleep my little angel, _

_ I will always love you” _

For a few precious moments, the brothers are there, one in both heart and mind. They are the brothers who did everything, but they are….purer. They are more aware than ever before of each other. 

“Thank you...Thor.” Thor wasn’t quite sure if he had imagined what he had just heard.

“What did you say, bro-Loki?” he murmured in quiet surprise.

“Thank you,” Loki whispered again. Thor smiled and pulled in baby brother closer to him.

“Anytime, Loki. Anytime,” he said. They sat there in bliss, together, for no more than a few minutes, but to them, it felt like an eternity. When they finally parted, Thor knew more about his younger brother than ever before, and Loki got a small taste of what his brother would do for him. For putting all things aside, they were first and foremost, brothers forever.


End file.
